Page yourself over the intercom. (Don’t disguise your voice.)
“Hi-lite” your shoes. Tell people that you haven’t lost your shoes since you did this.
Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it “IN.”
Put decaf in the coffeemaker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
Walk sideways to the photocopier.
While riding an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.
If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
Practice making fax and modem noises.
Staple papers in the middle of the page.
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